Days You Will Remember - How to Process Your Experience
There are many days you will remember in this life. These are times that had such a profound impact on your view of existence that when you reflect on them, you have either great joy or deep sadness.
Most of us can remember where we were on 9/11. That day 15 years ago is one of those significant life moments we remember, indeed one that we can’t forget. The September 11th attacks are forever etched in our minds as a moment when the world all of a sudden felt less safe.
Processing Your Experience
In this article are some suggestions for processing key dates you remember – the good ones and the ones that stir deep sorrow.
Typical examples of good memories include the birth of a child, a wedding day, the day you met your soulmate, a positive milestone in your career, and a weekend spiritual retreat that was your first spark of awakening.
Interestingly, it is human nature – really the ego self and not one’s spiritual self – to put more focus on memorable days or experiences that cause one pain. Example: dates like 9/11 get lots of attention and receive an enlarged sense of importance. Just thinking about them easily stirs deep feelings of sadness, anger, and a host of other pain-based emotions. Reliving images and sounds makes it even worse.
Conditioning to Focus on the Negative
Individuals have this conditioning to focus on the negative – so do journalists who cover the news. Media companies, mostly owned by big business, are driven by profits and they have found that bad news sells. The media ratings spike each time they cover a disaster like a terror attack.
For perspective, there is plenty of good news out there. And there are countless journalists and other writers who share uplifting stories of courage and love. It’s helpful to remember this, especially on days like the anniversary of 9/11. Keep that in mind and look for the good in horrible things.
After all, the mind will go to where attention is placed. It’s okay to place one’s mind on news of 9/11 – that’s honoring those who died – but do it with discernment and conscious awareness. Don’t give your power away by going to the place of fear, worry, and projecting into the future what might happen because of 9/11.
Remember that humanity and individuals are basically good. Within each person is a divine spark. That spiritual nature is not related to religion, race, gender, or country of origin. There is basic goodness in each one of us.
I’m not talking about magical thinking here. All people possess both goodness and a shadow side. In addition, we now live at a time with the largest and most diverse human population the Earth has ever had! People are at various stages of awakening - some still deep asleep spiritually, and at the other end of the spectrum, others whose lives have been fully devoted to the spiritual path.
It’s best to avoid judgment and not waste your precious time categorizing yourself or others. The path to enlightenment is an ongoing process, not a ladder with levels you can measure. At any point on the path, a person can make an unwise choice that comes from ego. Even spiritual masters do this – there are levels of mastery.
Monitor Your Energy
When you review a tragic event like 9/11, do your best to monitor your energy and be present. Remember: 9/11 is not happening now.
Because of media frequent references to 9/11, though, you may feel like this experience is in the now moment. You may then worry obsessively about what might happen next.
Self-censor your mind. Only you can control your own mind in the moment. You can stop that inner terrorist – your conditioned mind – from keeping you in loops of fear. Remember to breathe and come back to the now.
Reflecting on Your Personal Sad Moments
In every person’s life will be sad moments, times when you lose something or someone. It’s part of being human. Key times many people remember include: the day a loved one died, the day a fire destroyed their home, or the day they were abruptly fired from a treasured job.
There is no way to measure the pain of such things. Each of them can trigger feelings of loss, and with that, a feeling that a part of oneself is lost. That is not true of course, but it can feel like it.
Realize when you are reflecting on loss that the thing or person is not your individual essence. That part of you is not the other person, not your house, not your job. You have an eternal spiritual nature that transcends everything else.
Your house and your job don’t go with you to the next life. Sometimes you reincarnate with some of the same people, but each person has his or her own unique spiritual evolution.
If someone you love dies, their spirit will go on and have many great adventures. As you reflect on losing this person, keep in mind that you don’t lose them as your conditioned mind has you believe. Yes, they are no longer in the physical and near you. Grieving can take time. Honor the grieving process – it is a way of honoring yourself, the other person, and your relationship.
Grieving is a temporary experience – you won’t have it forever. Focus on the good you had with the loved one. Keep the higher view in mind - love is the eternal bond. Your love for one another connects you across time and dimensions. This kind of love has no expectations, no rules, and no limitations. Love of this higher nature is boundless and honoring – there is a trust that the universe is orchestrating the perfect divine plan.
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